Fun Stuff

The Lemon Squeezer

  • April 16, 2014

Another fun little tale courtesy of my mother. This is the perfect time of year for it.

At a local bar in downtown St. Paul the owner and bartender was so sure that he was the strongest man around that he offered a standing $1000 bet: he would squeeze a lemon until all the juice ran into a glass and then hand the lemon to the patron. Anyone who could squeeze two more drops of juice out of it would win the money. Many people had tried over the years: weightlifters, truck drivers, North Dakota oilfield workers, etc. Nobody had ever been able to do it.

One day this scrawny little fellow came into the bar, wearing thick glasses and a polyester suit. He sat down, ordered a glass of draft and started looking around the bar. After reading the sign on the wall about the lemon challenge, he said in a small voice: “I was just reading your sign, and I’d like to try the bet.”

After the laughter had died down, the bartender said, “Okay.” He grabbed a lemon and squeezed the hell out of it and then handed the wrinkled remains of the rind to the little fellow.

The crowd’s laughter soon turned to total silence as the man clenched his little fist around the lemon and six drops fell into the glass.

As the crowd cheered, the bartender paid the guy his $1000 and then asked the little man, “Do you mind if I ask what do you do for a living? Are you a lumberjack, a weight lifter, or what?”

The little fellow quietly replied, “I work for the IRS.”

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